


if my vices are a burden

by MiniNephthys



Category: End Roll (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Assisted Suicide, Canonical Character Death, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:55:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27010855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniNephthys/pseuds/MiniNephthys
Summary: Kantera and his selfish request.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	if my vices are a burden

**Author's Note:**

> my friend played end roll and suffered and now i'm suffering all over again

It’s selfish, to ask this of a child.

It’s selfish to ask this of anyone, Kantera knows. If he weren’t such a coward, he would have killed himself years ago, without inconveniencing anyone.

…Ah, but if he weren’t such a coward, would he have run the way he did? If he weren’t so selfish, would he even have ended his grandfather’s life to begin with?

Kantera is a medical practitioner. He knows all the ways that attempted suicide can go wrong. The last thing he wants is to survive as a burden on others.

(All of this is an excuse, he knows. He’s just afraid of pain, and afraid of losing his resolve.)

If he can ask anyone to kill him, it should be someone who has already killed before. Kantera doesn’t want anyone else’s hands to be stained like his. But the only person he knows who fits that description is a young boy.

Kantera should tell Russell to find a different way of living. If he were a better man, that’s what he would do. He would discourage him from this dark path he’s on and point him towards the light.

But that’s not the kind of man Kantera is. And perhaps if he were, Russell wouldn’t trust him enough to be honest with him to begin with.

It’s selfish, and Russell has enough selfish adults to deal with.

Perhaps the most selfish thing of all was letting Russell get attached to him. If that’s so, then the sooner Russell cuts him out of his life, the better.

“Russell, could you do me… a small favor? It will take but a moment. …Please-”


End file.
